Think They'll Get That Guy?

It's more than just mountains between us and the way he said "I love you I love you" before crossing the finish line their ankles tied together it reminded me of you.

Left Unsaid

Did it for myself and I still do cause I don't give a fuck about anybody else. I fall in love with day dreams, not people. Not girls whose fingers trace hourglasses in the air, who can't sleep without the television blaring on and on... it makes me feel so hateful. I dream about all the shit I'm doing when I'm awake just more tedious and repetitive in it's details. I wait for you to come around, in dreams, to vomit dirt and fabric from your desiccated mouth. I wait for you in dreams, to exist across time, to travel inside the dark dirt of our beggar souls. I saw the past through my presents eyes in a dream where you were dressed up in golden threaded splendor as my chest caved in from the pressure of so many fucking remember whens...

Digging with my bare hands until the fingernails split off of my fingertips from all the hard soil being packed beneath it. I'm digging for gold.

This is a fucking time machine

Stella Purdy

It's all death black on her leather jacket
Pins and spikes a poser decomposer
Tugging at plastic pearls
Standing on a table
Wobbling all legs
Drunk slurring
muttering

"I remember hardcore I used to go to punk rock shows..."

The City: Collectively Spitting in Your Face on a Daily Basis

It's the same sort of sunlight you get while you're lying in a coffin, the type of promise you feel when you're staring at the wrong end of a shotgun... and the thrill you felt in your chest the throat locked up tight without a key without a switch we'll drop thousands of floors down our to the pits of our stomachs, getting worried getting sick walking these salted streets dressed like a target I can see how it ends and I don't want a part of it... finely dressed to the nines he says "oh we'll just gut out the ugly parts of this city make more than a couple million and push them all out to new and worse ghettos."

I don't fear the leaders who seek to destroy our bodies... I fear the ones who destroy our souls one price tag at a time

Jenny Swanson Syndrome

She said "I wanted you to be there" and I couldn't apologize and admit that my jealousy turns me into some sort of sulking fucking baby at times. There weren't fireworks that night, though I wouldn't be totally sure time spent in black outs sure wish I could black out my days that easily.... twenty long hours since my last cigarette... I'm still waiting for Jenn to call me back and ask me to go to the prom with her. Ten years to the fucking day... There is a seam being split in the firmament  and I bet there is a poet writing much more poignant lines at this very moment as I emulate and infringe on so many copyrights.

I want it so badly just watching her sit there and put her arms around his shoulders. It feels so good to be the one receiving someone's affection sure but it feels comparatively worse watching the object of yours two steps away from fucking some other guy. I'm not too proud to admit that there will forever be regrets resting in my heart which will remain until it stops...

...a little honestly wouldn't have killed me in retrospect but a little honesty sure as fuck will kill me now.

And You Thought You Owned This Shit...

My good friend will also opine to us all on the greatness of life's lesser known deities. Every day he tries to learn something new about the esoteric. Such disgust practice! Yet I too engage in awful habits of sleeping with the past every night going back in time in my dreams. We need new things that would fit in so well with the past cause anachronism is the new black and cliche show kids own the night!

Fold your arms after applauding the poet boy! How we can look so pious as the laughter dies down? So swoon cynic, we ate this shit just for you to nod your head and think how right you are, how right you are! When you were so busy dotting "i's" and crossing "t's" we were passing out while you were passing out the rules and now you sit atop your castles laughing at us fools, "sharp dressed kids own the night but we own your 9 to 5's don't you forget!"

Her hair sticking together from the vomit coming out of her mouth. You told me we are made out of the same shit stars are made out of and I just shook my head and laughed cause we're more dead than those stars are creeping like corpses between jobs and commercial breaks. Tell me the music makers and artists are your kings well go ahead and try to serve two masters claiming you own the night before your head hits the concrete.

Some of us age better than others. Some of us make better wages than others. Some of us will forever be looking back... it's always better when you weren't really there and who cares if we own the night seems right, most of the world is sleeping on us anyway.

Last Rites for a Hardly a Person

The craving just kills me
Watching them dig hands into pockets impatiently waiting around for something, anything. I want to be in love for free, not having to just dip into our wallets to put smiles on our chapped faces. Listen to him fall apart and sink lower as he always does...
Sun kissed legs launching a thousand lust filled vessels and I remember how you pulled me closer and whispered in my ear "I'm fucked" well I didn't get to drink anything tonight and I never smiled with my teeth showing afraid of the fire that's inside of my stomach that's just burning away at me
t-shirts coldly sticking to our bones
Watch me confess everything, fall apart, well it's apparently apparent we're all miserable and ready to die, so I took a bird into my hand I pressed hard but he still survived and despite our struggle we still can't get the smudge of our filth to stain the carpets, discharge. blood comes out. it's okay, I want to die dear god but I guess I'll just float until I die and you'll tisk tisk my lack of selfless sacrifice all the way down to his goddamn bowels...